Relationship anxiety involves excessive fear, doubt, or worry about your romantic relationship—even when there’s no clear reason for concern. You might constantly question your partner’s feelings for you, second-guess your own emotions, or worry about the relationship ending.

Common signs of relationship anxiety include:

• Obsessive thoughts like “What if I don’t really love them?” or “What if they leave me?”
• Fear of being abandoned, rejected, or not good enough
• Difficulty relaxing or enjoying the relationship, even when things are going well
• Emotional overinvestment in a partner’s validation or reassurance
• Constantly monitoring the health of the relationship

While these worries can sometimes reflect unresolved issues with your partner, they often point to deeper attachment wounds rooted in childhood or past relationships.

Codependency and relationship anxiety often go hand-in-hand. If you grew up in a family where your needs weren’t prioritized, or where love was conditional or inconsistent, it makes sense that adult relationships might feel confusing or emotionally unsafe.

You may have learned that love had to be earned—through self-sacrifice, overgiving, or staying small. These internalized messages can lead to a strong fear of disconnection and a constant need for reassurance. Even in seemingly secure relationships, it may be difficult to trust, relax, or feel truly seen.

Clients who struggle with these issues often describe a push-pull dynamic in their relationships. They may become emotionally enmeshed with others, giving too much, and then suddenly withdraw when they feel unappreciated or overwhelmed. Or they might feel deeply attached to unavailable partners, hoping to prove their worth by “fixing” the relationship.

You may seem confident and capable on the outside—holding everything together at work, at home, or in your friend group—but inside, you feel emotionally drained or unseen. Some clients are surprised to learn that codependency can exist even when they appear outwardly confident and successful. This is sometimes called high-functioning codependency. You might be the go-to person at work, the caregiver in your family, or the reliable friend who always shows up—but inside, you feel emotionally depleted or unseen.

Often, high-functioning individuals are praised for their selflessness, which can reinforce the belief that their needs should come last. Over time, the emotional cost of overextending yourself becomes harder to ignore.

Healing from codependency and relationship anxiety requires both insight and practice. In our work together, we’ll begin by making sense of your patterns and where they come from—not to assign blame, but to offer clarity, self-trust, and direction.

We may focus on:

• Reclaiming your sense of self and values
• Exploring early relational wounds and how they shaped your current fears
• Learning how to set and maintain healthy boundaries
• Building distress tolerance for uncertainty or emotional discomfort
• Practicing secure attachment behaviors in real-time
• Developing inner self-trust and emotional resilience

I approach this work through a trauma-informed and attachment-based lens, drawing from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Mindful Self-Compassion, and elements of Lindsay Gibson’s model for adult children of emotionally immature parents. Therapy is not about eliminating your sensitivity or capacity for care—it’s about helping you honor those qualities without losing yourself in the process.

So many people I work with carry guilt or shame around wanting connection, stability, and reassurance. But these are not signs of weakness—they are signs that you’re human.

If you’ve been living on emotional high-alert, constantly adjusting yourself to keep others close, it’s no wonder you feel exhausted. You deserve relationships that feel steady, mutual, and emotionally safe. And you deserve to feel at home within yourself, whether you’re partnered or not.

Therapy can help you shift from self-sacrifice to self-respect, from emotional chaos to clarity, and from anxious striving to grounded presence.